Over the Edge - A tiny tornado in Kansas
- Written by Diane Blanco
I truly believe there is no better role in life than grandparent. For me, being a grandmother is a little like that mystical character in children's literature, the fairy godmother. She is all-wise and swoops in with her special brand of magic to make everything wonderful. She never has to deal with mundane things like taxes or leaky faucets or Internet outage. Everyone is always excited to see her. And no matter how dire the situation, she makes it all better while looking amazing. At least that's always been my personal vision statement for the job. When I had the chance to take care of my three little grandsons solo for four days, I couldn't get to Kansas fast enough. My daughter, Julie, and her husband were going house hunting due to a job transfer. She told me she had real reservations about leaving me with the 7-year old twins and 7-month old Baby Colin. I told her, "Piece of cake." She said Colin wasn't much of a sleeper, day or night. I told her not worry, neither was I. Wed be fine. And we were, for about two hours. Baby Colin's favorite things were to be held, rocked, bounced and rotated in interesting baby-equipment things. His least favorite thing was to spend more than 15 minutes in one spot. There are a lot of 15-minute segments in four days, I discovered. I should have had a clue that little Colin might be a handful. The day I arrived, the twins and I were giggling on the sofa about some silly thing or other when my daughter leaned over and shushed us. "Colin is asleep!" Landon looked up at me, and rolled his eyes, "Get used to it." My daughter gave me detailed instructions before she left about little Colin's feeding schedule and how to prepare his meals. His diet now included pureed veggies, baby yogurt and a variety of teething biscuits. His first official act in charge was to seal his lips at feeding time. No matter my tactic, his dinner wound up on his chin or down the front of his bib. I would have worried about the little prince starving in my care but my daughter assured me that his formula was sufficient as long as he took that. The other clue I had that he would be just fine was the circumference of his chubby little thighs, wrist and tummy. He clearly took after my side of the family. During my stay, I learned that I had the unique ability to balance a child on my hip while performing amazing feats like folding clothes, loading the dishwasher and brushing my teeth. I have no idea if I could have done it while styling my hair or applying makeup because I never got the chance. I also discovered that sitting down for a meal is really over-rated. I really miss the children now that I'm home. I think tonight, just for old times' sake, I'll stand over the stove and eat my spaghetti out of the pot while holding a couple of 10-pound dumb bells. Don't try this at home unless, of course, you happen to be a grandmother. Visit Diane's blog at LipstickDigest.com.